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Poems: "Child" and "Jenna"
Jan 20, 2003
I lost my son, Lewis just over 10 years ago - he was stillborn. My husband and I were heartbroken. A year later I fell pregnant with his sister, Jenna. There were complications with the pregnancy and I was taken in to hospital. I was there for 3 weeks, being allowed home at the weekends. After the 2nd week they realised that she was in serious trouble and delivered her by caesarean. She was in the Special Baby Unit and numerous tests were carried out on her. The results came back that she had Trisomy 18 (Edwards Syndrome). Jenna died 5 days after coming in to the world. I'd love to think that my children are happily playing together.
Child
A tiny life is growing
Inside a cosy place
His arms and legs are flailing
A smile is on his face.
His mother feels a tiny kick
Upon her rounded tummy
And waits impatiently for the day
When she becomes a Mummy.
The baby’s smile is fading
But his eyes are open wide
He knows that he’ll be leaving soon
But will never see outside.
There aren’t so many kicks now
In fact there’s none at all
Gran says that baby’s sleeping
And keeps knitting up his shawl.
His life is draining quickly
But no-one knows a thing
A tiny smile fleets his face
When he hears his Mother sing.
He knows that he’ll remember her
And the things he heard her say
Peacefully and happily
The baby drifts away.
Mummy knows that something’s wrong
And is at the clinic before too long
A scan is done and Doctor says
“I’m sorry, baby’s gone”.
The grief is overwhelming
The sadness takes its toll
Friends and family gather round
As he’s buried in his shawl.
As time goes by and lapses on
His Mother sheds a tear
And hears these words inside her head
“Mum I’m always here,
I’ll never ever leave you
Although you may not know
I’ll be beside you every day
Through laughter, joy and woe.
You’ll never need to miss me
For I am in your heart
And though we’re in two different worlds
We’ll never be apart”.
In loving memory of my son Lewis David Rafferty
© Karen Rafferty 1993
JENNA
A daughter lies in her Daddy’s arms
She’s just a few days old
She doesn’t have much time to go
She’s feeling slightly cold
Her Mum and Dad are crying
Their grief is all too clear
Granny bends to pick her up
And there falls a single tear
Her uncle feels a pain so deep
And tries to look so strong
She wishes he’d just let it out
It wouldn’t be so wrong
She slowly turns her tiny head
And blinks her one good eye
And begs for God to let her have
Her chance to say Goodbye
Her mummy looks at her so close
And says she wants to die
The message that her daughter gives
Is written in her eyes
“I wish you didn’t look so sad
I’m going to be fine
I’m going to visit Jesus Christ
And see that brother of mine
We’ll play lots of happy games
And sing a lovely song
You know you’ll see us both in time
In fact it won’t be long
Do not grieve and do not cry
I’ll be in a better place
And I know that when you join us
There’ll be joy upon your face
I know there’s not much time left
To tell you what’s above
But look into my tiny eyes
And you can see my love
I always will watch over you
With Lewis, hand in hand
And maybe in a year or two
We hope you’ll understand.”
Her breathing stops and all is still
The quiet is so loud
Her parents although deeply shocked
Are also very proud.
© Karen Rafferty 1994
Dedicated to Jenna Dawn
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