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Always In My Thoughts
Apr 28, 2002
My partner and I had been trying for a baby for a long time. We finally succeeded in 1998. I had an uneventful pregnancy, apart from getting married at 4 months. I was overwhelmed at the thought of having a little baby to make our family complete. It had been an active baby kicking and moving all the time, but at 36 weeks the movements stopped. An ultrasound confirmed that our much loved baby had died. I was induced and after a 24 hour labour I gave birth to the most devastatingly beautiful baby boy who we named Joseph-Mika. I had never felt such love for another person, it was overwhelming. My husband and I held him and had him blessed. A week later we had him buried in our local cemetary. I have never felt so sad and have never cried as much in my life. 3 years on I still feel devastated and find it increasingly hard to talk about my beloved boy. I have since had a healthy baby boy called Jonathan who was born at 31 weeks. He was in special baby care for a month but now is a healthy 18 month old boy. I adore him but miss my Mika more and more each day. I am beginning to think I shall never feel normal again. I know we have been truly blessed with Jonathan but I can't help feeling that I should have 2 sons here. I know God is taking care of Mika and that one day we shall be reunited. Until then he is always in my thouhgts
Sandie
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