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I Will Never Forget the Day
Sep 20, 2002
I was 4 months pregnant and excited to be going to the dr's to find out the sex of our baby. After 3 nurses trying to find a heartbeat and no luck, I started to cry in panic.. I didn't understand why they couldn't find the heartbeat.. the DR. finally came in and tried and she didn't have any luck either. She said there might be something wrong with the monitor, not to worry. So we went to have an ultrasound to find the sex (as I said before) and when the DR finally got the baby on the screen, she wasn't moving. It was the most devestating thing that I have ever been through, to see our baby just floating there, motionless... I broke down and could not get off the table fast enough. I have never seen my husband cry before this moment, this happened February 11, 2001 it was a Tuesday and I will never forget the day as long as I live. I miss Eva Lauren so much. I often think about her and what she would look like and wonder if we will ever fill the void, fill our empty arms. We have finally decided that it is time to try again, we have greived, even though it is something that I will never personally get over, I can move on and grow.. I have her in spirit and know that someday I will meet her.
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