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Feeling Alone and Full of Questions
Jan 19, 2002
I was pregnant for my third child. At about 16 weeks I had an amnio performed, where we discovered that we were having a little girl and she had Turner's Syndrome. It made no difference to us, we wanted her and loved her just the same. At about 23 weeks, I started having contractions, and delivered my precious Eliana Hope. She died during delivery. Her due date was March 21. As time gets closer to that date, it gets harder and harder to deal with. My husband, friends, and family don't talk about it. I feel isolated and alone. And even though I already have 2 beautiful girls, a four year old and a two year old, I just can't seem to get out of this depression that I am in and get past this. I used to love babies, but now I it makes me feel sick even to look at one. Whats worse is my husband really wants to try to have another one right now, and it has only been 2 months since Eliana died. How do I deal with this? How do I get past all of this pain and move on so I can be a good mom to my other 2 children? How do I get to the point where I feel like I have purpose in life? If anybody out there has any answers, I would greatly appreciate them. Thank you.
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