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I'm Praying for All
Dec 01, 2002
I just wrote a letter and lost it so I will write it again because I feel the need to share it. I am 28 years old with a 3 year old son. We started trying for our second child in August and found out we we pregnant in September. At first I didn't even know I was because I was having some light bleeding then it stopped. I took a test and it was positive. We were going to have our second child. Had my first doctors visit saw the baby and its heartbeat on the ultrasound screen and everything looked good. Went back 3 weeks later for my follow up. I was going to here my babys heartbeeat for the first time. The doctor used the doppler and could not get it so we went into the next room to get an abdominal ultrasound. Still no heartbeat(i didnt think anything of it), he did an internal ultrasound. The room was silent I watched the screen for a heatbeat. I didnt see a heartbeat then the doctor said he was sorry. I was in shock. I called my husband from the car. We went for the second ultrasound which confirmed what the doctor said. Two hours ago I was going to have a baby now I'm not. I went home and layed on the couch for 2 days crying waiting to have the D and C. That was the worst thing I have ever been through, my baby was dead inside of me and I was waiting for someone to take it out. the whole thought was and still does kill me. I cry daily and probably will for the rest of my life. I will never forget the day my second child's birthday June 16,2003. This kind of loss can only be felt by someone who has been through it. So for eveyone like me I am truely sorry for what you are going through. I pray for all of us.
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