The Pretending Game

The Pretending Game
LindaC

Grieving is a hard task.
The price you pay is so steep.
One works through the depth of emotion
Only to find there is so much more to come.

I try to deal with each new rise of pain and fear
I wonder if this will ever end.
The hurt goes on unrelentlessly
Pounding its' way into my heart.

A part of you will forever be kept safe in my heart.
No one can take that away from me.
I have memories of your life to sustain me
And someday I pray I'll be free from this pain.

Nights are still so very hard
Sleep doesn't want to come.
Morning comes so early
And I must put a cover on my pain.

I hate to admit to even myself the feelings I still have
How much easier it would be to slip into the dark abyss
Than to keep on with my pretending game.
It is a cover to protect others from my emotions.

I don't want to lose control by crying
But sometimes it just all seems too hard
I joke and smile and pretend that I am happy
The reality is too painful to let others see.

Nobody knows how I really feel
I don't know that they'd really care
It is more comfortable for all
When I play the pretending game.